A globally recognized women-led non-profit organization, the Life After Abuse Foundation (LAAF), has organised a conference for men, with the theme: “The Dear Men”,which focuses on the struggles and silence of men after facing some sort of emotional bullying/trauma.

The event was held on the 14th of June, 2025 in Lagos State.

According to the convener, Halima Layeni, Founder & Executive Director, the group aims to create a more inclusive and supportive global community where the well-being of men is prioritized and supported.

First speaker: Paul Oyewusi (Founder of Circle Men)

He spoke on “Understanding Trauma in Men”.

He said, “though the society has made the men not to speak up about their daily trauma and emotional stress, but it is imminent for such men to start speaking up and stop being shy. He said, no man planned the trauma they pass through while growing up, which has made most men to live the way are currently living.

He however urged such men to man-up, speak up and change the narrative, instead of bottling up the anger, the hatred and the negative character which was born out of their life experience.

Second speaker: Samuel Joseph

He spoke on how Drug and substance abuse affects mental health.

He said “the use of hard drugs and other substances are a major reason why most men are subjected to suicide. He said such drugs affects their mental health and drain them to the state of being unwanted. He also urged the men to speak up whenever they are in such state.

Third Speaker: Shola Adigun (Founder of Father Figure Initiative)

He spoke on Healing the father wound, understanding the impact of an absent father.

He urged the men to fix the issues fathers face in life. Issues which includes backlash from their father, mother or step-father and step-mother which has gravely affected their life as they advance in life.

He also joined other speakers to urge such men to man-up, speak up and change the narrative, instead of bottling up anger, hatred and negative character.

Fourth Speaker: Mustalpha Adeyemi (President KB Club)

He spoke on Emotional Vulnerability in Men.

He stressed that men should open up, engage with someone, explaining what they are going through. According to him, the men are seen as super humans who hardly show their feelings, which makes the society feel they are less vulnerable.

Mustalpha also said, at least 40 percent of men face series of maltreatments but are shy to speak up due to condemnations or being seen as a weakling.

Fifth Speaker: Barr. Dare Asobele, Founder and coordinator of Anti Suicide prevention squad.

He addressed the men on Toxic Masculinity and Healthy Masculinity.

He encouraged the men not to allow trauma take the best part of them. In his words, he said: “do not bottle your emotions”, Find a safe space to take, get help, do regular exercise, find an enabling environment, seek a therapist, do not allow trauma to define who you are, let go of the past, forgive yourself, forgive your parent or whomever that have caused you trauma, and see how you can become a better man in the society.

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